Saturday, January 7, 2012

making welcome



Yesterday we visited some old friends for a lovely relaxed lunch outside.

Our friends are recently retired and I had encouraged Carol to take up some embroidery.  We had spent some time discussing ribbon embroidery:  I sent her home with some ribbon, hoop. needles etc and The ABC of Ribbon Embroidery and I was pleased to hear that she had enrolled in a local class'  You can imagine how disappointed I was to learn that she had found the whole experience really discouraging.  The "ladies" in the class had been together for many years and didn't make any attempt to welcome two newbies.  I have attached a pic of what Carol had been doing in the class: her comment was that it was no where near good enough!  She felt quite intimidated by comments that were made and says she will never be good enough to do any form of embroidery. 

What is it about some people that they cannot encourage others?  

I intend to stretch and frame this piece and give it back to Carol - it is good work and she should be proud. 

8 comments:

artymess said...

Oh what a painful experience for your friend ...being a teacher i am so aware of how important it is to be encouraging and give people confidence especially learning a new skill ......i hope this hasn't put her off her work looks lovely and she maybe should join some fellow stitchers on line how about stitching fingers thats a good group you can post up pics of your work and I have found members there to be really encouraging and supportive ..x

Roses, Lace and Brocante said...

Dian I know that feeling...
Four of us joined the local guild here and had a similar experience.
The majority of the group just ignored us, only the odd one went out of their way to engage with us.
We stayed for a year and decided in November we didn't need them!!!!
We continue to meet fortnightly and that's lovely!

I've just become your newest follower - sorry as I thought I already had - must be the age thing!!

Wishing you all the New Year Blessings you're dreaming of Dian - and much much more!!!

hugs
Shane

Judy said...

Some groups are just "CLICKY". Hope your friend doesn't give up.There are some wonderful groups out there.I have just found one.Tell her to keep on trying!!

Karyn said...

What a shame for your friend. I dont know why people have to be so mean spirited, it always shocks me. We should be encouraging women instead of tearing them down.
I think her work looks lovely and good on you for framing it and encouraging her to be proud of it.

Linda said...

I think the embroidery looks amazing for a first time, and Carol should be encouraged, not discouraged by picky comments. People are so thoughtless at times. I can understand her not wanting to go back to such a group, and only hope that type of group is in the minority. Thankfully, our local group has always welcomed new members and encouraged them in every way, whether they embroider, hand sew or machine sew, it's all the same to us, even if they just want to come for lunch and companionship. I hope with your encouragement, Carol will do more ribbon work, she's made a great start.

Radka said...

What a shame your friend had a such bad time :( I think her embroidery is fantastic for someone just starting! What it is with some people? They should be pleased to have more members!
I hope your friend doesn't give up, it is so important to have a hobby when retired :)

Katherine said...

Its beautiful and she should be very proud of it. That is exactly why I prefer not to do classes and muddle through on my own of beg for some online help. Its totally discusting behaviour on their part to act in such a way. Give her lots of encouragement from all of us on here.

Gina E. said...

Your friend's stitching is beautiful, she should be very proud of herself. Some women are just plain bitchy! They were probably jealous of her first attempts being so nicely worked.